The Love, Intimacy, & Fulfillment Challenge

* What is the Real Song? How do we attain it? Keep it? Maintain it?
-What is it worth?
-Is it worth protecting?
-Don't be afraid to play.
-Jump in the mud...have fun!
-It was meant to be ENJOYED!
-Learn and explore new things together.
-"Never too late to have a happy childhood!"

LOVE CHECKLIST:
1- The one you want to marry = your best friend.
2- Preparation! Discipline. We're not born with character!
3- Write what makes you feel loved.
4- Tell them "I love you". But let actions also follow!
5- Write expectations of yourself & of the other. (Discuss realistic & unrealistic)
6- What makes you know you are appreciated? Valued?
7- Find out if they like surprises...and surprise them...but don't be mechanical.
8- What are the things that bring you joy? Sorrow?
9- What hurts you? Frustrates you?
10- What do you like to do-enjoy doing?
11- Do you like receiving things/hugs/kisses/a touch???
12- What do you like & prefer talking about?

Further exhortations for love:
· Communicate-regularly
· Listen (James 1:18-20)
· Quick to forgive & ask forgiveness
· Don't make assumptions & accusations
· Don't judge. Ask. Inquire-without jumping to conclusions. Ask them what they meant by what they did or said. Then mention how you felt...how you took it to mean____...

WARNINGS FOR POTENTIAL PARTNERS:
Remember: It's the 2nd most important decision in your life!
· If you can't pray openly & share your heart with personal issues AND with regards to Jesus, spiritual life-stay clear!
· Marrying an unbeliever will bring confusion, compromise, and loneliness. (You cannot talk about spiritual matters, struggles are attempted to be taken care of in one's own strength-not God's.). But if you are already married, that's okay...trust God...continue to love them and live out His life before your spouse. Pray for them, don't berate them. (See 1 Peter).
· Watch motives...why they do what they do. (Especially during betrothal).
· Work through key issues before marriage...because after=no incentive.
· Character: "It is impossible to teach sex apart from character."
Ø Be inexperienced in sex & experienced in character.
· Self control
· Know vision, heart & dreams-1000's have scarred lives & shattered dreams.
· Independence. The ideal is "interdependence". Time alone yes-but not at the expense of the other. (1 Cor. 7:3-5).
· If they are not under authority.
· Unrealistic expectations (i.e. you cannot make yourself taller or shorter, or 5 Lakh job.)
· You could be dating the future potential wife/husband of someone else!

Wrong motives for love:
1- Satisfy family, culture
2- Peer pressure-please friends
3- Because of loneliness
4- To be loved
5- Satisfy physical desires
6- To be like everyone else
7- Too young
8- Too quick
9- What you can get out of it-no commitment
a. Getting vs. fulfilling

Accountability:
What does it mean?
· Protection, correction, encouragement, & support.
· Helps you to keep your values-words & standards.
· No man is an island...made for need of one another-the right people.
Ø Why do many men-people hide from accountability?

APPLICATION
1- What will I give up for love?
2- Will I serve, & give myself-my body to my spouse?
3- What steps will I take to protect my love, my beloved?
4- What can I do to continue stirring the desire of my husband/wife?
5- How, when & what will I communicate to my husband/wife?
6- What words can I express to my wife/husband that nourish, excite them, fuel desire, & satisfy them?
7- How can you SPECIFICALLY display-show-demonstrate you love to your love, beloved?

So, what is Love?
· Unconditional surrender of self for another.
· Only debt allowed = love.
· Keeps no records of wrongs.
· Prefers, protects, lays down ones life.
· Love is Spontaneous
· Love is a choice
· Commitment
· It wants the best & highest for the other.
· Love Risks
· Love covers
· Willing to put aside ones own interests for the others.
· Love cause me to recognize that what is important to them is to me.
· Waiting. When you know you are whole. Not giving spouse pieces of you.
· Love is demonstrated in how I treat the other in public & private.
· Love is willing to admit being wrong.
· Love is serving them-when I feel like it and when I don't = give & take-commitment.
· Exclusive...SOS in a nutshell! They were totally without reservation-exclusive.

 

<< Back to list page - Email this Page